Is Same-Sex Adoption Better Than No Adoption? A Lutheran Response

This essay addresses:
    •    The recent case of a same-sex couple adoption involving a registered sex offender
    •    The argument that “any adoption is better than none”
    •    A clear Confessional Lutheran theological foundation
    •    A defense of God’s design for family
    •    An articulation that the Church is not behind in compassion, but leads it globally.

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Is Same-Sex Adoption Better Than No Adoption? A Lutheran Response

The claim that “children being adopted by same-sex couples is better than no adoption at all” is often framed as compassionate and practical. It appeals to our emotions: “Isn’t it better for a child to be loved by someone rather than by no one?”

At first glance, it sounds noble. But a compassionate lie is still a lie. And still dangerous.

Take, for instance, the real case that made headlines recently: a same-sex couple shared a widely celebrated video announcing the adoption of a newborn. Joyous, heartwarming—until it was discovered that one of the men was a registered child sex offender. The same public who had applauded the adoption then reacted with horror and disgust. But this wasn’t an aberration of the system. It was the logical result of an ideology that prioritizes adult feelings and political validation over the child’s holistic good.

Contrast this with another reality—one often ignored: Christians are, and always have been, the world’s most consistent leaders in orphan care, compassion, and mercy ministry. The Catholic Church operates over 5,500 hospitals, 18,000 clinics, and 16,000 homes for the elderly and disabled, making it the largest non-government provider of healthcare globally. Protestant and evangelical networks lead global responses to the needs of over 150 million orphans, forming and equipping families and institutions to provide care that upholds both love and truth.

So let’s make something clear: this isn’t about love versus hate. It’s about truth versus sentimentality. It’s about what truly serves the child and what honours the God who created that child.


1. The Created Order Matters

God in His wisdom established marriage as a union between one man and one woman (Genesis 2:24). This is not merely for reproduction—it is the foundational structure for human thriving. It reflects the relationship between Christ and His Church (Ephesians 5:31–32) and provides the necessary complementarity—male and female—that every child deserves.

To place a child in a same-sex household is to deny that child the lived experience of both a mother and a father. More than that, it institutionalizes a lie: that sex, gender, and parental roles are interchangeable or irrelevant. But this isn’t a neutral arrangement—it’s an environment that teaches by its very structure that God’s design is disposable.


2. Compassion Must Not Be Weaponized Against Truth

We must grieve the real and tragic reality of orphans and unwanted children. But the emotional urgency of their need must not blind us to what is good, true, and right.

Saying “any family is better than none” is a false dichotomy. Would they hand a baby to a cult? To a family that teaches hate? To one that refuses medical care, or feeds them soda in their bottles? Would you say it’s fine if they never went to school, or were raised to lie and steal? 
But there's more. Some of the very people who defend kids being raised by same sex couples would get in the verge of a heart attack if that kid would be sent to a home that:
-refused to send the child to school at all?
-don't vaccinate children
-don't believe in land acknowledgements
_doesn't push the climate change theory
-voted for Trump
-allowed sugar before 3 years old

This shows that there's more than one angle to this question and that it isn't really loving to answer tragedy with moral compromise.

Christians must not allow themselves to be manipulated by false compassion. We must reject the narrative that necessity trumps theology, or that sentiment replaces Scripture. As Luther said, “You should not believe your conscience and your feelings more than the Word which the Lord Who receives sinners preaches to you.”


3. The Church Must Not Abandon the Orphan—or the Truth

One of the most tired but dangerous arguments used to justify same-sex adoption is: “Well, at least they’re stepping up. Where are the Christians?”

Where are the Christians? They are already leading. And they have been for centuries.

From the early Church rescuing discarded Roman infants, to the founding of the first orphanages, hospitals, and care homes, Christian compassion is not reactionary—it is faithful to God's Word. Today, the global Christian community provides millions of dollars, volunteers, homes, and institutions to care for orphans, foster children, widows, the poor, and the suffering.

To say “Christians aren’t doing enough” is not only unfair—it’s factually false. Could we do more? Yes. And we must. But we refuse to accept that the solution to our failures is to bless a structure that denies the very image of God in family.

The Church is not behind in compassion. She is the engine of it. But compassion must never be divorced from confession. Love must never be separated from truth.


4. Every Child Deserves a Mother and a Father

Every child comes from a mother and a father. To be raised without one or the other due to tragedy is one thing. To be raised intentionally without either is something else entirely. This is supported not only by the Bible, but by basic human biologic and behavioural studies.

Children need both male and female role models—not as a matter of personal preference, but as a matter of divine design. Male and female are not interchangeable. They are distinct, complementary, and together reflect the fullness of God’s intent for family.

To say that a same-sex couple can raise a child “just as well” is not only a denial of Scripture—it is a denial of nature, experience, and common sense.


5. The Heart of the Gospel: Truth in Love

Jesus never affirmed sin. He loved sinners—yes—but called them to repentance and new life. He didn’t tell the woman caught in adultery, “You’re fine as you are.” He said, “Go and sin no more.”

Likewise, the Church must speak clearly. To bless a same-sex household as a legitimate context for raising a child is not an act of love—it is a failure of nerve. It is refusing to speak the truth because we fear being labeled unloving.

But the most loving thing the Church can do is hold up God’s design for family, for human life, and for children—and to embody it.

So when we speak against same-sex adoption, it is not because we hate—it is because we love too fiercely to accept less than what God has said is good.


Conclusion

So no—a child adopted by a same-sex couple is not “better” than no adoption at all, if that adoption means forming them in a setting that is contrary to God's creation. Love without truth is not love.

The Church must continue to lead in compassion, action, and mercy. But she must also hold the line on truth. Because what’s at stake is not just policy or opinion. What’s at stake is the soul of the child—and the glory of the Creator.